MM // Halloween

EDIT: I had to change the title of this post because of the amount of traffic it was receiving from people google searching "dirty moms". Yuck.

Happy Halloween!

Ha. Just a word to the wise. Don't google search "dirty moms." Let me tell you a secret. I hate to get my hands dirty. I know, I know- what a priss, right? It's embarrassing to admit but I will go to great lengths to keep my hands clean. I have gardening gloves, kitchen gloves, bathroom cleaning gloves. I will use multiple paper towels to clean up anything I deem gross... which is a lot. I just really dislike touching things that are squishy or wet or that will leave a residue on my hands. Which you can imagine has been a bit of a struggle for me as a mom. And like I said... I dislike this about myself. So, over the weekend a took a BIG step (for me). 

That's right! I cleaned a pumpkin. I touched all the gooey guts and pulled out all the seeds. It was kinda a big deal for me. I don't want to pass on my ridiculous dread of dirty hands to Lilly. I was pretty proud of myself. ;)

ps- have you entered the lost cabin vintage giveaway yet? It ends tonight!

Mommyhood Monday (on a Tuesday) // Halloween

Over the weekend we went to the zoo and unbeknownst to us they were having a Halloween event. The parking lot was full of kids in costumes and Lilly was not. I panicked for a minute. Then I felt like a failure of a parent for another minute. Then I put on my big girl pants and got over it. Lilly was wearing the bunny hat I made her so that was something.

she was very concerned about the sad ghost.

She had a blast and got some treats but can I be honest? It stressed me out! I am stressing about Halloween! I feel a certain amount of pressure (as I'm sure a lot of moms do) to come up with something  spectacular and then to make it myself. But you know what? I so don't think that's going to happen. And we are coming down to the line here! Halloween is one week away! I'm stressing. (did I already mention that?) Yesterday I even went to Target and walked down those torn to bits aisles to see what was left. Pretty much squat. There were some cheerleader costumes or generic princess costumes but they were so expensive (for a cheapskate like me). $20+ for a costume of something she doesn't know/care about and that she will only wear once, and for only like 2 hours?!? I couldn't do it. So here we are. A week before Halloween. No costume. No real ideas. Nothing. 

I will probably just throw something together this week. After looking back at the photos from the zoo I'm thinking about just finding a matching pink tee and leggings and throwing a cotton tail and whiskers on the girl and calling her a bunny. Does that count as hand made?

Paint in the tub

Painting in the tub turned out to be one greatest things ever. Lilly loved making the mess. She loved stepping in the paint and say "Ooooh. Slippy." She even loved cleaning off the mess with a sponge. I saw this idea somewhere on pinterest but, of course, didn't pin it so I can't tell you where the idea came from. Oh, well.

♥

ps- we used Crayola washable paints in case you were wondering. ;) 

MM // That time I cried my eyes out at Disney World

Last Wednesday we took Lillian to Disney for the first time. We weren't sure how she would respond since her only other interaction with people in animal costumes had been the Target dog and she was terrified of it. But I think the pictures really say it all. She had an amazing time. She loved everything about it and only got a little scared during Mickey's Philharmagic. 

I, on the other hand, could not keep myself together. I cried while we watched the Dreams character show, I cried when we met Rapunzel (she hugged her and said "I love you 'Punzel." How could I not?!?), I cried when we watched the parade and I cried when we met Mickey and Minnie. They were all happy tears though. It's amazing how emotional becoming a mother can make you. I mean, I was emotional before, but now it's out of control! I just imagine what it must be like for Lilly to see Jessie and Woody walk by during the parade and then hear her squeal "Jessie! Jessie!" and I am so overcome with joy that I cry.

Being a mom is pretty awesome. You get to relive all of the greatest moments in life. 

♥

Miscarriage

Generally, I try to keep my blog a happy place and not burden all of my lovely followers with my junk but I had an epiphany today. Some of my favorite posts by other bloggers have been ones where they open up and share what is really going on and I am comforted when I read about their "junk" because I know I'm not the only one. Based on that thought I have decided to share some of my struggles with the hope that if anyone else out there is feeling similar that they know they are not alone.

I have been feeling sad recently about the miscarriage I suffered over the summer. Sometimes I am just plain mad. When I read back through my posts about it I am really mad. Why did I feel like I had to play down the situation? Why didn't I just let myself grieve? If I had not miscarried  I would be approximately 25 weeks now. Sometimes I feel an overwhelming sense of loss. Sometimes I feel afraid. 

I need to write these words on a bunch of post its and put them all around my house because my emotions can be very overwhelming at times. If you have suffered a miscarriage, know that you are not along. And if you need someone to talk to please feel free to email me. (sara.stofferahn[at]gmail[dot]com)

So if I owe you something like an email or blog button or whatever- it's coming. My heart is heavy and I am working at a slower pace these days. 

♥

Artsy Fartsy Photos by Lilly

My little photog. 

♥

ps- I found this picture on the camera with the rest of this photo set. Apparently while Mommy was out with Mrs. Amy last week Lilly decided she needed to put lotion on her tattoo like Mommy does. ha.