VBAC VS Cesarean

I have been avoiding blogging (and thinking) about this but I'm running out of time. At my last doctor appointment I was told that I need to make a VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarian) vs elective ceasarian decision. To be honest, I was surprised my doctor even gave me an option. I thought I'd have to find a specialists to allow that but I was wrong. Here is what my doctor says:
- I'm a good candidate for a VBAC since I didn't have a failed labor with Lilly. I had a scheduled c-setion because she was frank breech.
- The risk of rupture (my uterus rupturing during labor that is) is less then 1% which is good but if it does rupture the result could be devastating. Not good.

Here are some of my thoughts on a cesarean. My doctor says that my ectopic pregnancy over the summer was probably a result of scar tissue that had built up from my c-section with Lilly. So if I have another c-section will that increase the likelihood of another ectopic if we have more kids? I also have a lot of internal scaring from that was discovered during my surgery over the summer. If I have another c-section will I get a bunch more? Some positives from having another c-section is that they would be able to remove a lot of that scar tissue and (a biggie) I would be guaranteed MY doctor. The office I go to is a group practice so if I choose a VBAC I'm not guaranteed my doctor. I will just have whoever is at the hospital at the time. So my planning loving brain is not a huge fan of that.

More thoughts about a VBAC: I've always felt a strange sense of loss that I didn't get a chance to even try to give birth to Lillian. I have also never been comfortable say that I "gave birth" to her. Because I didn't. She was surgically removed. I know that I carried her and grew her in all that but I still have trouble with that one detail. Obviously, a VBAC is not major surgery so it is less of a risk for me and healing time should be less. I vividly remember how standing up for the first time after my c-section felt and I am keen to avoid that. My biggest problems are the risk of rupture and not being able to have my doctor. Less the 1% is a pretty good statistic but the fact that it would be devastating if it happened scares me. We're talking possible loss of baby and/or uterus. I'm not sure I'm ready for a hysterectomy at the age of 26. And my first thought with not being able to have my doctor was what about being induced. Well- turns out they don't do that for VBAC's. In fact they don't do any sort of alterations to labor. And that could actually be a good thing since a lot of induced labors end in c-section.

I've been spending a lot of time praying for this situation. I have had a hard time trusting God with this. Pregnancy makes me very self protective so it's hard to give that over to him. I know his plan will be best and that it is completely ridiculous to even think that I could do any of this on my own. I have until the end of January to make my decision. I plan to spend lots of time praying and trying trying trying to give this to God. I'd love to hear from you too if you have any experience with this.

Sorry if this post seems a little disjointed- that is how my brain has been working lately.


  1. Hey Sara, just giving you some encouragement that if you choose to go VBAC you could totally do it! I think the amazing experience of giving birth is something that if possible, every woman should experience. It's totally amazing! But I definitely understand your fears about the process. I had a TON of fears about giving birth in general. God totally handled it and gave me confidence that was not from me. In whatever you choose I would try to do some research on your own about things you can do to make your choice successful. One of my friends tried for a VBAC but the nurses pumped her with so much pitocin that her uterus couldn't handle it and she ended up with another c-section. Another friend had a successful vbac and a great experience. Anyway, I love you! Praying for you and this decision. :)

  2. Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year! God bless you! xoxo ♥

  3. Hi Sara, I found your blog while looking for pics of Becky Lyon's vintage button collection - then I found this post. I had a c-section with my first little girl, who was breech, and am due to try for a vbac any day now with our second little one (due date was last wednesday). I feel really good about my decision and have deep trust in my care providers (who have lots of experience and success with vbac). I understand the strange feeling of being a mom and yet feeling like I haven't given birth - I don't even know what a 'real' contraction feels like! And now that I'm trying for a vbac, it's kind of bizarre that this will be considered a first labor and birth for me. For a while I was in denial that I would even have the opportunity to birth this baby vaginally, since that opportunity was withdrawn the first time. And to be honest, I was kind of shocked when this baby situated himself head-down. But I feel so ready and resolved at this point - I'm back to the place where I'd be disappointed to have a c-section. Anyway, I'd be happy to chat about this if you want some comraderie. In any case, I wish you luck and peace of mind.