Ben is a wonderful father. I feel so blessed that he is in our lives. It brings so much joy to my heart to see he and Lilly interact together. She loves him and he loves her.
We had a good father's day. Ben had to work in the morning so it was just the girl and I. We ate breakfast and then hit up Target for a few things (to which she cries "no carget no carget") and then went to church. Ben got home a little early (woot) and got extra play time with Lilly before her bed time. We had a slow cooked bacon wrapped pork tenderloin for dinner (drool) and gave daddy his present: a new fancy iron. I know this sounds like a strange present but my hubby loves to iron. When we got married he registered for a fancy iron which we got so then he went out and bought me a cheap iron so I wouldn't have to use his fancy one. ha.
On a side note: I have to call Ben "daddy" all the time now when Lillian is around. She heard me call him Ben once or twice and has started to use his name instead of daddy. I think its super funny. He does not agree.
Anyway, over the weekend I read this post from Rachel over at letters to ames and it really resonated with me. This part in particular:
"There are few skills in the domestic world that are strictly maternal.Things like birth and breastfeeding, or supersonic hearing, or mother's intuition - these are forces of nature not to be challenged. Moms were simply made for these things. But bathing a baby? Doing the dishes? Changing a diaper? Even holding a baby? These are learned skills. Someone taught us these things - maybe our mothers, or a friend, or even a labor & delivery nurse. Anyone can learn how to do these things, no matter the gender or the age or the amount of previous experience.
My point is, we shouldn't elevate ourselves to the point of making men feel incapable of caring for their own children. I've done this without even realizing it. One time, Ames fell down in front of Chris while they were playing. I rushed over to pick up my boy and comfort him. Chris stopped me and scooped him up. He said something along the lines of, "Don't do that. Let me handle this. I am his father." So simple. He is their father. It took the two of us to create them, and it's going to take the two of us to raise them. It's become clear to me that the more I intervene and take over, the more likely I am to push my husband away. In return, I will become bitter & resentful when he doesn't help out more. This will most certainly cause a rift in our parenting relationship, and the relationships he shares with our children - a rift that might become irreparable if it grows too wide."
How incredibly true this is? I know for a fact that I do this all the time. I become to anxious/nervous that something will happen to my baby that I don't want anyone (including Ben) to take care of her. Talk about trust issues. Not only am I not trusting Ben, or who ever else is caring for Lilly, but I am not trusting God either. No matter how much I love Lillian, He will always love her more.
The point is that your child's father is just that, their father! They love them as much as you do and care about their safety as much as you do. Let's give dad some credit. *points finger at self*
Did you have a good father's day?
♥
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