Currently.

ok- so this pic is from a week or so ago but I am currently wearing the same white tank.

I stole this from Dani (again). It is seriously one of my favorite posts. I would love to do one of these a month. Hopefully I can remember...

- obsessing over: The Hunger Games. I really wish I could say something more mature then that but I can't. Honesty at it finest (and most embarrassing). I literally cannot stop thinking about the books. When I get into a series I can't help obsessing over character motivation and unexplained parts (I mean did Peeta kill that girl when he was with the tributes or not??!? Foxface was attributed as his first kill so he must have lied before...? Arg!) I have watched the trailer for the movie about 30 thousand times. Yep. Obsessed. 

- working on: perfecting a pattern for smaller stuffed animals. I follow a pattern I bought in a kit years ago for most of my toys but I would like to makes something a little bit smaller so I can make more the one a month! I tried to translate my knit pattern to crochet (gave up) and have tried the pattern with half the knit stitches but same proportions. Boy, does it look funny. Some tweaking is still needed for sure.

- thinking about: what I am going to name this little girl! Whenever I feel her move I want to call her by her name and not just "little girl" but I haven't come up with anything yet. I have a baby name book that I love but it is currently making its way back to me from being out on loan. I am so excited about giving her a name.

- eating: gum. It helps to keep me from snacking constantly which seems to be a theme of my pregnancy.

- wishing: it was mid-February. My MIL is coming to stay with us for two weeks. I am so excited. I know that is generally the opposite sentiment when it comes to mother-in-laws but I really do love mine. Plus, having someone with me and Lilly all day every day for two weeks. YES PLEASE. So excited.

What's going on with you?

♥

20 Weeks

Well, technically I am 20 weeks and 3 days. Things are still going very smoothly. Like I said before, time seems to be flying by during this pregnancy. I remember feeling like it was the longest wait to find out if Lilly was a girl or boy and we already know with this one! (girl) I also feel waaaaaaaaaaaaaaay huger (more huge?) then I did at this point last time but I suppose that goes with the territory the second time around. I had a friend over last week who is a few days shy of 40 weeks and she said, "Sara! My belly button is already half way popped out!" 40 weeks. My belly button gave up about two weeks ago. It isn't all the way out but enough that you can see it through shirts and makes it appear that I have a third nipple. le sigh. I have struggled emotionally a little this week. My fuse is very short and unfortunately I've lost my temper with Lilly a few times. I am so thankful that my husband is willing to pick up the slack on the days I am easily overwhelmed and that he continues to encourage me to be better (even though I can have a hard time being reasonable while he is attempting to encourage me).

Overall, things are going swimmingly. I am anxious to name this little girl so I don't have to call her "little girl" anymore. This could be a bit of a daunting task considering how long it took Ben and I to agree on a name last time... I'll keep you update. 

♥

Mommyhood Monday // No to no!

Hey! No making faces!!

As a mother of a toddler I find myself saying the word "no" more then any other word in the English language. (That may be inaccurate but let's just go with it.) Naturally, I can be a controlling person. I like things to go according to plan and I like to do what I can to make that happen. I didn't even realize this about myself until I became a mother and had a little creature at my sides all the time trying to derail my plans. As you can imagine- adjusting to motherhood took some time. To be honest, I am still adjusting!

 One major adjustment for me has been learning to say no to no. It is usually the first thing out of my mouth when Lilly asks me a question. But I have realized that I really need to question my motivation and think about her request before saying the N-O word. I've found that a lot of times I am simply saying to because I don't want to do what she does. I don't want to paint right now. It's too messy. It requires too much set up and clean up. I don't want to go outside because I don't want to find her shoes (and pants) and have to chase her around. I don't want to let her walk at the grocery store because she is more likely to wander off my desired path. I realized that a lot of times my motivation for for saying no was straight up selfish and silly. And it turns out sometimes we have way more fun when I say yes! Sure, I may be more tired at night (at least I don't have trouble falling asleep) or have more to clean up or take 40 minutes to do something that should have taken 10 but in return my little girl feels loved and has possibly even learned something. 

Saying no to no has honestly improved our day to day life. Sure, saying no is still a very necessary part of parenthood but I want to embrace those moments when its not. Why not say "yes" when I can!? We fight less and hug more. And that is definitely worth losing a little bit of that control I love so dearly.

♥

Beach Getaway (Image Heavy)

This weekend we got a chance to get out of town and jumped on it! I have wanted to have a little family time and to go to the beach for a while now. It was perfect. 

We spent lots of time resting and relaxing. We played on the beach a lot and ate a bunch of junk food. We found a sand dollar that was still alive! First living sand dollar I've ever encountered. We also saw some sting rays that my hubby practically chased through the water. If he wasn't fully dressed he probably would have dived in after them. It was a wonderful (and much needed) vacation.

Did you have a good weekend?

♥

Mommyhood Monday // Resilience

If I recall correctly this photo was taken during Lilly's second time out of the day. It was definitely before 10am. 

One of the hardest things, for me, about parenting is the sheer tenacity you must have about discipline. There are so many times that I don't want to tell Lilly no because of the impending fight it will cause. The fact that I choose to use the word fight shows a lack of resilience on my end. There should never even BE a fight. I am the parent! It isn't like she has a valid argument: 

-No, Lilly, you may not have M&Ms for breakfast.

- But mama, I need M&Ms. 

-No.

-WWWWWWWWWWWHHHHHHHHHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY?!?!?!?!?!?!?

I have read that toddler-hood is all about discovering boundaries and the role of the parent is to enforce these boundaries. It can just be tough, you know!?! Some days I don't want to have to tell her 45 times to not stand so close to the TV or to be the one who says no to sugar upon sugar upon sugar all the time. Some days I just want her to be happy with me all day and not think mama is a meanie. And sometimes a break is necessary (for example- the other night I dreamed that Lilly died and was really shaken up by it. The next morning I ran very late to church because of how long I sat and snuggled her in front of the TV.) BUT- I have to keep in mind the my goal in parenting is to raise a well adjusted, responsible, adult. Not an adult sized child. Therefore- I will continue to tell her no even if it isn't fun for me. I will continue to be the bad guy because I know she will love me for it in the future (Like when she has broken the habit of sticking her fingers in her crack all day long. She would not be a happy middle schooler if she couldn't help sticking her hands in her pants when she got nervous.) 

So a word to all the other toddler moms out there:

WE CAN DO IT!

No matter how much they fight.

All day, every day.

I promise.

♥